TRANSCRIPT - 159 - My Why and why YOU need it.

Exhale, retreat. My why and why you need it. This is the retreat that I have been wanting to create for so many years and there came a point where it needed to
happen and that's exactly why we're doing it because if you've been following along
here for a little while, you'll know that I've been through my own body burnout journey. I suffered from adrenal fatigue, I had serious gut issues, there was brain fog, I was grumpy and I was just at a point where I felt like I
was completely falling to pieces and it was years and years of chronic stress that
had got me to that particular point and I needed to find a way out and I needed
to find a different way through that and this retreat is the culmination of all of
the things that I have found, that I have experienced, that I have put into my own
toolkit to support me to getting to the place that I am now, where I am a
completely different person. I feel so alive, I feel so rejuvenated,
and I have so much more energy to be able to put back into my business and into
my family, and all of the other things that are really, really important to me. So
That is why I decided to bring this retreat to life. I felt like there was nothing
else in the market that was really speaking to this because I sit in a very
corporate world. You know, you guys are the people that I get to speak to on a
day -to -day basis. You're not sitting in or exposed to so much of, you know, that
the woo -woo, and I love the woo -woo, but I also understand it's not for everybody.
And so I wanted to create a space where you could get a taste of some of these
alternative healing modalities to understand your body in a different way, to
understand the physiological impact that stress has on our bodies.
And I know that we are all experiencing chronic stress because that's the life that
we lead, particularly in our corporate worlds. And I wanted to create a space where
you could step away from all of that noise, all of that stress for a moment, and
to just create some time and space to really rejuvenate yourself, to create a
opportunity for you to refill your tank, to get clarity on where it is that you're
going and what it is that you want from your one precious life and how your
business can actually then be shaped to support and enable that. And the reason that
I ended up in my own body burnout is yes, there's a physiological thing that
happens to our bodies that ends up in that point, but it is a bunch of
psychological things that we have done along the way. It's redundant trauma that
we've been storing in our body. It is the impact of chronic stress. And chronic
stress is coming from our perception of the way that we see the world around us,
the choices that we make, the belief systems that we have. And I want to create a
space where you could have more knowledge of those things because we don't get
taught this stuff. We go to We get told, you know, take a pill, do this, but
there's so much more that we can do for a preventative standpoint to support our
own nervous system, our well -being and our healing. And this was the journey that I
went on. You know, this constant living in this fight -flight state was something
that I, you know, I ended up experiencing quite significantly for myself. I got
stuck there. I didn't know how to get out of a fight -flight state. and these are
the things that we don't learn and I really wanted to be able to share that with
you because when you're living in that fight -or -flight state, you are in that
constant alertness, you're constantly on, you're constantly scanning for threats. Every
little thing that goes wrong, you just explode at. I became dragon mum.
You know, every time the kids did something, I was like flying off the handle and
I didn't have that regulation to be able to kind of keep myself calm. It also made
me a really unpredictable leader because my team didn't know what to expect me from
me. I couldn't make decisions clearly. It was impacting every different part of my
life. And so all of these things have come together to create my own experience and
my own healing journey. And this is what I want to be sharing with people. And
that is exactly why I have created exhale. Now, the reason I've called it exhale is
because beautiful Brené Brown, one of my inspirations, she shared a story in one of
her books, Braving the Wilderness, about how she was to present on the stage the
following day with another mentor. And the mentor said to her, "I'm going to go and
take the night off. I'm not going to go to the social dinners. I'm not going to
do anything because I need to rejuvenate myself for the next day." And she said,
"Sometimes you just need to take that time to actually pause and have that exhale
because what happens is we're constantly inhaling, inhaling, inhaling, inhaling and we
need to stop sometimes and exhale and take that moment and take that pause because
that is where we will be able to come back to ourselves to create that space and
to create that opportunity for us to really revitalize and rejuvenate ourselves. Now
who is this retreat for? This retreat is for women who They're ambitious, they're
driven, they're in business, they're either excelling at the top of their career or
they are owning and running their own businesses. They're usually probably in their
30s to 50s because that's the age group that we are kind of in this state and I
find this because myself in my mid 40s is that I think that over time we get to
a point where our body just says I've accumulated enough, I've put up with enough
and I'm done And that's when we start to notice all of these things appearing in
our body. We might be on the verge of perimenopause. We might be going into
menopause. There's lots of change that is happening physiologically already in our
body. And we've got this buildup of stuff that we have potentially left unprocessed
for a really long time. And so I wanted to create a space where these women who
are always on managing households, running children around, dealing with everything,
running businesses, leading teams, and then also leading households to have space, to
just stop, to take that moment, to reconnect with themselves and give themselves a
rest because we are always on. And the other thing that I think happens is where,
you know, I've been through this process myself, you're constantly climbing that
corporate ladder, you're constantly going after that next thing. You've got a next
goal. You want to just keep driving forward. But with that, you do not have taken
the opportunity to stop and actually read a fine what success looks like for you.
And that is something that I know personally is because we are living in a world
where we're told what we should be doing and how we should be doing this and how
we should be growing and how we should be leading. But what happens is we can end
up looking really successful on paper. We might be having the really growing
business. We might be having a thriving bank balance as a result, but inside we
don't feel aligned. We don't feel alive. We don't feel rejuvenated or excited about
the career we've chosen or the business that we've got. And we just leave left
feeling really uninspired. And I wanted to create this space where we could take
that step back and actually reconnect with what it is that makes us feel alive, it
makes us feel joy and then work out how we can create that back in our businesses
and in our lives. And this is that moment to do that. It's that time to exhale,
to just pause and then reevaluate exactly what it is that you want to be creating.
Now, I think that this retreat is absolutely necessary for any women who are at
that peak of their career and in business because I have the opportunity to go into
so many different organizations and work with so many people in that private one -to
-one coaching space. And what I see is that these women, even men,
like I don't even want to discriminate between male and female here, is I see
people on the edge of burnout or in burnout and they don't even realize. And I'm
saying this without any judgment at all because I was exactly the same. I had no
idea that that was where I was at, because as far as I was concerned, I hadn't
collapsed, I hadn't ended up in hospital. So therefore, it must be still more in
the tank for me to give, and I haven't hit my peak yet. So just keep going. But
what I see time and time again is people who are completely burnt out, they're
frazzled, they're not sleeping, they're struggling with gut issues and things
constantly. and they don't realize it's their nervous system crying out for support
to actually help them feel rejuvenated and alive again. And this is why I think
this retreat is absolutely necessary because whether you're male or female, having
this space to step away and to really reevaluate where it is that you're doing,
where you're going and how you wanna get there whilst taking care of yourself is so
important because at the end of the day, if you do not have your health, you have
nothing, you don't have a business because you can't show up every day. And I had
this conversation with my accountant two years ago and it absolutely hit me home
when I was in the thick of this burnout, was that if I didn't take care of me,
who was gonna be showing up to lead my business? There was nobody else, there was
no backup plan, there was no, nobody else was gonna be stepping in and taking care
of all of those things that need to be taken care of except me. So I have to
take care of me first, otherwise there's nothing left to worry about. It just
doesn't happen. So the other thing that I've experienced too is that my personal
experience with the health system is that it's very much, you know,
once you've got to the point, you've got the disease, you've got the symptoms,
you've got the issues and then it's a bandaid fix but without going back and
dealing with the original root cause and that's where burnout continues to accumulate
because we're not changing our behaviour patterns, we're not changing the way that we
process things, we're not changing the way that we eat exercise or how much
hydration we take in or the mindset shifts that we need and I think that's where
we need to be coming back and really having a deeper look at what's going on for
us to be able to kind of step forward and create a life that we really really
want to be creating. Now what I wanted to do with this retreat is I wanted to
blend two things here because I know as a busy business owner taking time out of
my business is hard. It's a dedication and I want to completely acknowledge that
because I'm asking you to take Day and a half two days out of your busy schedule
take two days out of your weekend Which you should be could be spending with your
family and Invest them in you and I need to make sure that this retreat is going
to give you a return on investment to make that time worthwhile and I know that
that is a big ask for you and I want to make sure that I'm delivering on it and
I absolutely will be because When you come on this retreat you will walk away with
so much more clarity and there are the next steps that are gonna be happening in
your business because you'll know by reducing all of that external noise and coming
back through to your center and I was explaining to you how we're gonna do that,
you will have that crystal clear clarity about where you are going because you have
tuned back into yourself, your intuition, what you know to be true about you and
your business. That is the ultimate outcome that you will get from this retreat and
you cannot get that from sitting in your desk or going to work every day or
sitting in your car in the commute. It just doesn't come and I know this firsthand
because I have been on many different retreats, business retreats,
health retreats, but this is going to bring the two together and the The opportunity
to spend time around other like -minded people with different perspectives sharing how
they address their challenges in their business, how they operationalize things, it
will spark new ideas for you to see some of the things that are happening in your
business in a completely new way. You will be able to come back and know exactly
what's working in your business and what you intend to continue to invest in. You'll
know exactly what you need to stop doing, that is not moving the needle forward,
has drifted you off course, there's no longer an alignment with where you want to
be going and you know exactly what you need to create because you now have the
clarity to see the gaps and go, this is what's missing and this is where I need
to go. You're going to have so much inspiration as well because you are going to
be deeply immersed in nature and I can tell you the things that happen inside our
body and inside our brains from being reconnected with the natural world is where we
get so much inspiration. It starts to come through.
And that energy that you will get from being in this space and reconnecting with
yourself and with that wider environment is going to change how productive you are
and how strategic you are. You will stop being reactive. You will start being
proactive because you can see where you're going. And the other thing that you'll
get from this weekend is so much more nervous system regulation. And when we are in
our calm rest and digest state, we will respond. We don't react.
And this is where that overwhelm and flying off the handle and those knee -jerk
reactions that we get when we're in a heightened stress state all gets quietened
down. And we'll be showing you how to do that and taking home so many of these
tools with as well. It's not something you're just going to experience once while
you're in this beautiful container of space. These are tools that you'll be able to
take away with from this retreat and use in everyday life. Your leadership presence
will inspire your team, it will inspire your clients, it will inspire your family
because when you are much more calm and regulated, your presence is going to be so
much more focused. You know what your priorities are, you know where you need to be
spending your time. And these are all the tools that I'm going to be teaching you
so that you can be far more effective without burning out. Because one of the
things that I struggled to really understand was how can I continue to do all of
the things that I want to do when those are the things that have been burning me
out? How can I continue to have the business and the lifestyle that I desire
without it burning me out? And all of that comes back to how you can hold capacity
and its capacity in our nervous system. It means that you can hold more without it
draining you, without it feeling like a heavy weight and so you can have the
business that you want, you can have the lifestyle that you want and exactly the
way that you are living but by building that internal capacity and that comes by
changing the inputs the way that we feel about things and widening our window of
tolerance which you're going to learn about while you are on this retreat with me.
Now I've kind of hinted at a couple of times this is a much more holistic approach
to looking after ourselves which means that you are going to be learning about
nervous system regulation, how you can confidently move yourself out of that fight
-flight -free state because when we get stuck there that's when all of our nervous
system starts to go into overdrive and that's when that reactive, aggressive, angry,
frustrated, shut down, numb, just want to hide away from the world, those states.
And I got stuck there myself. I had no idea how to get back out of that state,
back into this rest and digest state. But I now have a toolkit. I have an
understanding of how my body works. I know what I can do to shift that state
really really quickly and I'm going to be sharing all of that with you on this
retreat so that you can do it. In addition to that, you're also going to be having
daily meditation to help quieten your mind and your body and come back and get
really present with yourself and reconnect with your own body. You're going to be
experiencing daily gentle movement with our beautiful yoga practitioner Heidi guiding
us through those movements as well. You're going to experience breath work with the
beautiful Amber Hawken and my own experience with breath work is such a
transformational thing. I don't know why I have taken so long to really connect with
this because it helps to shift so much what I describe as stagnant energy that gets
stuck in your body out of your system. And when we can shift everything that feels
like it's kind of weighing us down and clogging us up, that is when that internal
capacity starts to come. Because you're no longer got all of this junk inside you
that is just sitting there rent free, you get rid of it all and it creates space
for you to be able to hold something new. And so I can't wait for you to
experience the breath work Amber. We're also going to have a beautiful sound healing
journey with the lovely Courtney from Heart Residence. So she is going to be
drifting us off to sleep one night with a beautiful sound healing lullaby.
And the impact of these vibrations that you get from the music and how it starts
to shift things in your body and change your internal frequency is just incredible.
And I know that that all sounds like a little bit woo -woo and a bit cuckoo, but
trust me, when you experience this, the shift that happens in your body,
the way that things move, you know, we are all water. Like,
and if you look at water, the smallest breath on a pool of water creates a ripple.
And that ripple is a vibration. And when we add sound to our environment, it shifts
how our internal body is responding. And so you can do this deliberately when you
understand how all of these mechanics within your body start to work. And so I'm
going to be sharing that with you too. We've also got the lovely Kerry Krieger
coming along. Kerry is an acupuncturist and Chinese medicine practitioner. She
specializes in women's health, in perimenopause, and she's going to be sharing with
us how we can start to optimize our health and our well -being for vitality. How we
can start to work with our natural biological rhythms rather than against them. And
how we can start to incorporate that into our day -to -day lives so that we can
really begin to thrive. Because I think there's women, you know, we work against
ourselves so much because we're trying to live in this man's world that has been
created as very masculine energy, you know, driving and striving constantly, but when
we can actually stop and understand how this is actually impacting our body and work
with our natural cycles, the amount of energy that we have when we are in flow
rather than force is just incredible. So I can't wait to have those conversations
with her as well. And as I said, in addition to all of this, we're gonna be
having lots of conversations around how this applies back to our business, our
vision, where we're going, what's important to us, and all of this is going to help
us really reconnect with that intuition. Because I think, again, in this busy world,
we take so much external noise in that we forget to tune back into ourselves,
to that gut feeling, that knowing that we have about what is right and wrong for
us, and I really want to help you reconnect with that. And that's exactly where
this space is gonna come from. So once you've finished with this retreat, you can
expect so much more energy, so much more clarity. I really wanna reignite that fire
within you, refresh your mind, refresh your body and your spirit. I want you to be
able to show up fully at work and at home. And I wanna give you a lot of
strategies for you to be able to sustain this wellbeing long after this retreat and
I want you to be able to do it knowing that it's not at the sacrifice or expense
of you having to lose your ambition or that drive or that dream that you've got
for the business that you want to create. I want you to find clarity. I want you
to rediscover your own passions and the tools to support your work -life balance. I
want you to have really clear clarity on what's next for your business and what's
happening in your life and I want you to be able to create a business that
supports the lifestyle that you want to create because at the end of the day, if
we're not creating businesses that give us the life that we want, what is the
point? And I know that I have been through so many of my own evolutions, trying to
tweak and change and continue to evolve my business to create the life that I need.
And that's gonna continue to change because my life changes, the season of life that
I'm in continues to change. So as that season continues to change and shift, I need
my business to adapt and change with it. And this is giving you the permission and
the space for you to be able to start to look at that. I want you to be able to
build connection with the women that are coming. These women are other ambitious
driven women who have big dreams. They have big goals for their businesses,
but they're not gonna do it at the expense of their health. And this is about
showing you how you can have both and how to balance them in a way that works for
you and the life that you want to create. And this isn't about short term, this is
long term. This will ripple out into every aspect of your life, your relationships,
your career, your overall sense of wellbeing. This is about how you can start caring
for yourself and how it's going to create healthy relationships in your world. It's
going to enable you to make smarter business decisions because you've got the clarity
and the capacity to think clearly and act decisively because you know exactly where
you're going and what's right and what's not for you. You're going to have more
creativity and innovation because when we have space that is where creativity comes
from and as women we are highly creative beings. We create babies,
we And inadvertently, we are creators. And so I want you to tap back into that
energy and know that you have that potential to take back into your business. And I
want you to have a greater capacity to lead and to lead with impact. Because I
know that as purpose -driven women, that is what we are here to do, to lead with
impact. Now, I can't emphasize the aspect of community enough.
If you know me, you know that that is what I'm all about. My business is called
community. The purpose of our business is to foster the creation of connection. Let
me start that again. It's to foster the creation of community where people feel
connected. I want you to find your place at work and in life. It's all about
connection. It's all about creating community, having a sense of belonging, knowing
that you're among people who believe what you believe. That is what this is about
and you are going to have such an incredible opportunity to connect with these women
that are coming and to build lifelong friendships, to learn from them, to share with
them, to celebrate with them. That is what this is about and in this high, like
this retreat, when we get people together in an intimate setting for a few days,
this is a transformation that lasts for so much longer after. Now,
I've given you a really deep dive into what's going on here. The other thing that
you can expect, I forgot, is the nutritional element. This is all going to be
completely catered for you. You will not have to lift a finger. Once you get here,
you will be weighted on hand and foot. All of our food is going to be prepared by
our retreat they, this is what they do, they create incredible food and we are
doing it in a way of an adrenal diet. Now adrenal diet is all about supporting
your adrenal so you're not putting extra load on your system. It's about eating
light, fresh, organic, locally available produce and I can tell you it is delicious.
The food will be refined sugar -free, gluten -free, mostly dairy -free with a little
bit of maybe halloumi or feta on the side is your option. It is going to
absolutely tantalise your taste buds. I have experienced their colour and cuisine
firsthand and it is delightful. So I cannot wait for you to experience the food on
this retreat. You will be so surprised at how great gluten free dairy -free,
sugar -free food can taste. It is absolutely magic. So I want you to come along on
this journey with me over the next few weeks. I'm going to be dropping in with
some episodes that are coming live to you from a series of Instagram lives that I'm
going to be doing with both our retreat facilitators that are going to be joining
us, some of our guests that are joining us, and some of our support crew who are
going to be along for the journey as well because I want you to see different
aspects of this. I want you to get a taste of what the experience is that you're
going to feel from this retreat by the modalities and what our retreat facilities
are going to be sharing with you. I want you to understand what caused other people
or inspired other people to say yes to themselves so that you can potentially see
in that journey. You will also get to start to meet some of the retreat guests
before you've even arrived. So I really would love you to either join me live over
on Instagram. You can find me at Melma, M -E -L -M -A -R. And if you follow along
there, I'll be telling you when those lives are coming up. You can come and join
me live or keep popping back in here on the podcast, and you'll be able to tune
into them here as well once they've been recorded we'll drop them in here so that
you can have a listen in and experience all the goodness that is going to happen
on this retreat but I would love you to come and check out the page telling you
all about all the nitty -gritty details of what you can experience. If you head to
my website melissamarsden .com .au you will find at the very top of my home page
there's a link there that will take you through to the retreat. You'll also find it
in the show notes, or if you're watching along here on Instagram, it's in the bio,
go and check it out. It is going to be one magical, magical weekend. It's happening
on October the 23rd to the 26th. It's happening in the beautiful Tweed Valley. It
is a pristine piece of land that has been very rarely touched and has got such an
incredible energy to it and that is half the magic of this experience. That is why
I've chosen this location 'cause it is just magic. And I can't wait for you to
join me and to experience it yourself because this weekend is not just a holiday.
It's just a strategic reset for your business. It's a strategic reset for you. And
you are going to walk away with so much more clarity, so much more energy and with
tools, experiences, knowledge, to live and to lead differently in your life and in
your business. So follow along for those up -crumming Instagram lives that I'm gonna
be dropping in to give you a taste of this experience. Head over to the website,
melissamarsden .com .au, check it out, and I can't wait to welcome you to joining me
and exhaling.